Sunday, March 30, 2008


Received a call this morning from my brother. Mak wants to know if I am coming over today. For the umpteenth time, Mak calls and asked if I can drop by for a bite. If I can then she will prepare something for me. And for the umpteenth time I am unable to come. I feel bad, really bad. Pity the poor old lady, pining for the company of a son who is so near yet so far. I now know how that feels but situation dictates that her heart be broken again.

I am at fault. Yes, and I will remedy this.

Monday, March 24, 2008

Sunday, March 23, 2008

Similar yet different

Know the common spud, I say peh-tae-toe you say poe-tah-to. Same thing with tomatoes. Similar yet different but remain as the same thing. Its how it is pronounced and listened to that creates a lot of confusion. The bane of all human issues. Especially between men and beings who came from Venus.

I kept being told not to expect people to be like me, that everyone is different. I know, I know its true yet it is so hard to accept. Just like an old friend who is a genius who became an oral examiner. Most cadets fail, why ? Because being smart he expects those cadets to be smart too. When they do not meet his perceived basic standards (which is way too high), they fail. He uses his standards not the industry standard. Why does he do that ? First because he is a genius, secondly because he is a responsible person. Committed to his job and wants the best for the industry. Which in turn became his failing because his methods disrupts the new entrant rates into the industry.

I digress, why am I babbling about this ? Well, I just came to realise that at this stage in my life I am able to and can afford to be forthright in voicing my opinions. Be it something mundane or matters of the heart. Therein lies the problem. Not everyone can do the same thus leaving me hanging and having to make assumptions.

Look, this is how I feel. Do you feel the same or am I just annoying you with my antics ? Are you merely tolerating me ?

We couldn't have gotten this far otherwise. Perhaps we express ourselves differently...or maybe your expectations is too high ?

What would you make of that ? I stay puzzled as dictated by the circumstances of these events. Why does this bother me so ? Because I have been on both end of the conversation. And one of those is certainly not pleasant. What I need is clear cut answers which does not seem to be forthcoming any time soon. See, I am not the type of person who can translate actions into expressions. I will just have to bear it I suppose, please god, give me patience...

Tuesday, March 18, 2008

Tioman - snapshots

One of these guys was so taken by a made up story on the medicinal value of a plant that he took one and start chewing (luckily it was not poisonous or anything)... it was difficult trying to hold a straight face that we burst out laughing. Can you guess which one ?

The island's standard mode of transport.

The little princesses enjoying (???) the boat ride in choppy seas.

The heroes, its all about them really.

We had and island wide blackout...

... and heavy rains but...

... great food, good company and...

... an excellent host, made it a fun and worthwhile trip. Puan Rozita of Nazeri's place in Kampung Air Batang, highly recommended.

Finally, our organiser, most probably imagining himself to be "Duyung". More "Dugong" don't you think ? He he he...

Monday, March 17, 2008

End of the Campaign Trail

Go on, make up your own story....

Friday, March 07, 2008

For Bbugs

There comes a time when all I need is a sounding board to which I can unleash all my thoughts and empty my mind. A sounding board that just absorbs with nary a fear of it being used against me. For we sometimes do and think about unthinkable and unacceptable things. A shrink, psychiatrist or therapist fits the bill but will cost money on top of the fact that they do it as a job not a buddy.

I was lucky to have such a sounding board. Only catch is that its half a world away. Separated by time, distance and now changing lifestyle. There's so much I want to tell, to offload, to air the furthest corner of my mind. Just have to hold on a bit longer I suppose. Some might say, come on; speak to your wife, best friend, mommy or daddy. Yes, most things can be discussed with those close to you but some can never, ever be revealed unless you are ready to face some unexpected consequences. I learned that the hard way which reinforces the need for the sounding board.

Maybe circumstances will enjoin us again soon. In the mean time, this is for you. A little pristine white flower in the middle of harsh bushes doing nothing yet its presence soothes the soul.

Tuesday, March 04, 2008

FE not ED

Failure to ejaculate not erectile dysfunction. Scary male topic.

FE may seem to be ideal at first glance as opposed to PE - premature ejaculation, however continued occurrence may lead to frustrations and depression on the male. FE may be brought about by stress, food and most likely the intake of wrong mix of supplements and medications. Most likely to be experienced by males over 40 or those that think that they are coming down from the peak.

The cure may include corrective diets, stress relieve and therapy.

Why am I posting about this ? Been there done that. Am just trying to say that it may seem to be the end of the world while you were in the thick of it (it really is), but its not. Take care guys.