Monday, May 28, 2007

Parting Ways

The decision finally manifested itself like the last nail being hammered into a sealed coffin. And like a sealed coffin, the next step is inevitable. For Jim, there's no other way but to end what he has been trying to build during the best years of his life. No other option exists but to part ways. As Jim ponders the necessary to formalise the separation, he can't help but recall how it had began and how the end is now coming for this union.

They had embarked on the union with common ideals and objectives. It was exciting going through the ups and downs of realising their vows. They worked hard, much harder after the arrival of the kids. A decade down the line, the ideals began to crack. Their choices began to differ. Their objectives does not match anymore. Where had he gone wrong ? Where had they gone wrong ? This question begs to be answered and in answering Jim realised that no wrong has been done. Only that they both had changed. Changed by the passage of time. Altering their values and needs. Each became a different person in the others eyes, maybe because each does not conform to the others expectations after all these years.


The one thing that they both agreed on is that the kids should be well taken care of. Jim realised that no matter how well they plan, the separation will have a negative impact on the kids. He also realised that he is beyond the point of return and that is just something that he is powerless to prevent. At first he thought that perhaps he could continue with the charade for the sake of the kids, but it doesn't work. The negativity and lack of warmth is not lost on the kids. The elder even starts to blame themselves for the situation. That is what finally drove Jim to come out and make the move towards separation.


It is sad, yet the prospect of escaping the suffocation provides some comfort to Jim. He imagined going through the coming days on his own. That is the price that he has to pay. He just could not understand why life has been so unfair to him. Why does this happen ? There are no third person involved for either of them, no drunken bouts, no late night outings, no abusive violence and money has always been in abundance. Theirs were a civilised union, yet, it came to an end when it should be at the peak.


Jim just sat there staring at the papers with teardrops slowly making its way down his cheeks. There are just so many consequences, so many causes, so may thoughts and hurts and pains that invaded his mind and he is powerless. All the years, the efforts, the joy and the sorrow, all of them will be relegated to a deep dark place in his psyche. And the kids, the kids will be hurt too.


With that thought, Jim raised his pen and in one swift movement put his mark on the papers to initiate the inevitable. He just hoped and prayed that somehow the kids will be alright.

10 comments:

lady macleod said...

poignant. very well written. disturbing.

Mat Salo said...

I like the way you tell this story, Cap'n. Damn, you're getting better and better with each post! But the subject matter is "not lost" on me. The way I see it, I think they should MAKE EVERY EFFORT to reconcile. The children, why should they have to suffer? Lot's of long-term repercussion.. Can't you, as a friend, intervene?

Relationships have their cycles, fall-in, fall-out of love.. That' what life is all about. It's also about loyalty, commitment.

But that's all water under the bridge, I suppose.

Err, what's that .. "till Wed, 15 September 2032"?

Raden Galoh said...

It's sad when 2 adults' decision is made in such a way... the children's feelings? are they accounted for too? the children's needs are the sacrifice? So, so sad when it become inevitable just because one has fallen out of love...or is it?

loveujordan said...

What a touching parting ways indeed !!

Sometimes when something happens, it just happens.. no matter how hard we try to avoid anything bad happens.. it happens... separatioan is a norm nowadays.. just hope all parties will have brighter future especially for the kids.....

Apandi said...

lm, thanks, poignant yes, and disturbing, very disturbing

ms, intervene ? hmmmm...
yeay, you won for being the first to notice and ask about the 2032 date. its from deathclock.com, though I think they miss the day cause mine will be a thursday. the day you came will also be the day you go. tapi errr, jangan sampai jadi kurafat pulak ;)

rg, maybe I will analyse this further. yes, the kids...

lj, what you say is so true and scary because it is the norm nowadays. have we become a society of escapist ? running away from the consequence of our own doing ?

J.T. said...

Separation is a painful thing to deal with.. all the hopes and dreams come tumbling down. We want to say that we are now a society of escapist but how can we blame some who really need to get out of the relationship because one party is suffering so much physical, mental and emotional pain? Stay and suffer? Or start anew?
No one gets together with the intention to divorce. Things happen in life. Some just grow apart. If they really want to salvage the relationship, they can. But it takes effort from both sides. It is sad when a couple chooses to go separate ways. The children suffer too. As much as the kids say they can accept the separation after awhile, they will go through life carrying a 'baggage'. My heart goes out to the chilren.

Raden Galoh said...
This comment has been removed by a blog administrator.
Apandi said...

jt, yes, things happens and in this situation the sins of the fathers will surely be visited upon the sons - the baggage - that will shape their thoughts and actions.

rg, thanks for your thoughts.

zabs said...

Salan buat Apandi. Tu adik dalam gambar adik-beradik? tu macam kenal je... dia senior research di MIMA kan? maaf kalau salah orang.

Apandi said...

zabs, betullah tu, tapi la ni research fellow...